Equality! (for us, not you)

At this moment, I am not a Californian, no matter how much I may or may not want to be, but I was one for a very long time and internally still feel like I am one and will be again.

I am not the voice of the black anything (man, woman, family, dog, cat, etc.), so I speak for no one but myself. Period. There is no meeting where mandates are stated, mindsets are synchronized or even common likes and dislikes are solidified (I still don’t like fried fish).

I state these things because I am truly upset at the outcome of the vote that passed prop 8 in California. A lot of the news coverage on this vote has focused on the fact that Black people (who are pointed out achieved history and an ascension, via the Obama election) voted highly to pass the law, which removed a dear right from the gay community, by revoking their right to marry. Yes, YES, it is highly hypocritical for people who preached and dreamt of the evolution that a Black Presidency brings to take away an inalienable right (and it IS) from anyone else. It is also not close to being solely their fault. Everyone who voted against gay marriage is wrong. I will tell you where a great amount of fault lies, the church. The church, who’s beacon preaches both equality to ALL and the right of judgment to NO human, told everyone to vote this prop into law. If I’m correct, judgment is to be made at the end of rapture and it is to be made by a single entity, an entity higher than any dude in a robe and/or funny hat. The church paid approx. 40% of the promotional costs of the bill and also they preached it to their followers, and most minorities are followers of religion. So the church has a lot of the weight of this decision in their hands, both currently and historically (although they’d have no problem with that at all). For years homosexuality has been against God, it is apparently in the bible and for some reason it takes more precedence than a whole lot of sins, some that have been flat out dismissed and some just relegated: How many people are truly vilified for say working on the Sabbath or having consensual adult sex before marriage? I’m talking , law necessitated, removed from their family AND church, have to live in secret shame, thoughts of suicide, vilification. And why? Because they love another human being, just different from the kind you like. Equality is equality is equality is equality, ad infinitum and it will never change (hence, ad infinitum). If God is judgment and no man is God, then give everyone the equality they deserve here on earth and let God do his job, because if God is God, it is his right and he is much better at it than you are.

Let’s play opposite world, where Male/Female marriage is an abomination; your Mother and Father aren’t allowed to be married and you are 9 years old and have to have your tonsils or appendix removed, simple operation, but you’re a child and you are scared to death, you want to see your parents but you can’t see both, because one of them, I won’t designate which, isn’t legally your guardian and in pre and post-op, they can’t see you. Worse, you’re 13 and one should die, now you have to go to a foster home because the survivor has no legal rights to you, maybe you’ll get lucky and stay with an aunt or grandmother, but the person who has raised you your entire life has absolutely no legal right to you, plus the consensus is that you’re better off that way anyway, because imagine the ridicule you’d suffer if your classmates found out you had a mommy AND a daddy (oh the horror!)

I do not want to hear that homosexuality is a choice, because who would choose such ostracism and instant painful outcast status by a cruel society. I won’t hear “sanctity of marriage”, because Marriage is not more righteous than actual human right, if one is allowed the right, then all should (see: equality is equality). And I will piss on slippery slope; outrageous theory does not preclude, nor outweigh human right or equality. I cannot seriously believe that allowing two humans the rights that marriage allots will lead to a law someday that says Gomer can legally fuck his pet emu, I just can’t. There is a large difference in practicality and absurdity and I’d like to live in the world of the former and would probably bail out of the latter and it is not fair to equate the two. Giving black people and women the right to vote didn’t lead to the ability to fly or control the weather or any other unrealistic comic book trait I can think of, but it did give them an undeniable right, promised by the document that made us one of the greatest experiments the world has ever known and it simply hurts that in an age where so much can and does instantly happen, that not only is this right not allowed to gay people, but was given then taken away. Shortly after Kerry ran for president, there was a website consisting of Americans apologizing to the world, because we as a whole voted G.W. Bush back into office and I remember that a large part of me apologized because there were a lot of similar props around the country that held similar legislation and unfortunately, it has happened again and not only in California; Arkansas and the other states that had anti gay bills were also passed. So once again, I am truly sorry, even more sorry this time, but unfortunately I can only speak for myself. We are supposedly entering a time of hope, so my hope is that this prop and its restrictions and those like it will first be seen as an injustice and immediately reconciled everywhere, because equality is equality, ad infinitum.

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8 Comments on “Equality! (for us, not you)”

  1. jaqai Says:

    Mandy and I got in a big ol discussion about this. First, for the record, I totally voted no on prop 8. If gays wanna marry, cool. I’m into equality for everyone. And frankly, I don’t understand why non-gay people care so much about what gays do with their relationships. I certainly don’t understand why they are using “what are kids going to think” as a means for defense. Kids don’t damn care.

    But, I’m not a fan of this thing being directly compared to the laws that existed that said black people couldn’t marry back in the day – and here is why:

    I realize “gay” isn’t a choice exactly, but it is still different than being born black/white or born asian or mexican. It’s still something…you…well, you almost grown into isn’t it? (I’m sure just that statement could set off a huge lightning storm of controversy – but seriously. I wasn’t born a sexual being…I grew to become one.)

    So, take it a step further.

    Polygamy is something that is totally and completely frowned upon (Ironically, historically tied in closely with the church that went a long way in funding the “yes on 8” advertisements out here in Cali). Buuuut, if you argue gays should be able to marry, I’m wondering what would stop Polygamists to start a “equal rights” revolution of their own?

    Lets say gays can marry. At that point is it still ok to say, “hey! It’s a law that you can’t have more than one wife.”

    Here is my point: I truly believe in equality for all, but it…it can be quite a slippery slope. Because the moment you say, “I believe in equality for all…but within reason” it all comes crashing down.

  2. adrilla Says:

    Jaqai, you honestly tripped me up, BUT here’s what I’ll state in pure debate retort to my post and your reply, but marriage states One Mate per person. So law states I am allowed one wife (and my mom reaally wants her to show up), why shouldn’t anyone who truly loves someone (or really really believes it’s worth it) be allowed that same Single Mate, the problem is they are trying to define the type of person they are allowed to pick which IS the basis of how racial inequality was meted out. So I see allowing a mate to legally pick another mate to spend what they feel will be the rest of their lives as marital equals, the same as me being able to marry the white woman that would’ve gotten me disowned from my Stepdad…if he was still married to my moms. If the church wants to get behind multiple partners, they should probably get on top of divorce first which is a REAL biblical sin, and talked about more than any man on man action which was in full force during and before Jesus (see:Greco-roman culture) but hey, if fags don’t marry they can’t commit the sin of getting divorced can they? (last line not pointed at Jaqai, whom I respect very much.) <–noted for the public, cause Jaqai knows I’d marry him anyday.

    (in a state that would allow us, were he, or I, gay, not valid in Puerto Rico, or Hawaii, taxes not included, only at participating restaurants, batteries not included, 0.9% APR for approved credit only, vasdkldkfhaldkhflkdafothernonsensethisisallstupidtextthatimtypingtobesillyasioftendoyoucanstopreadingnow)

  3. jaqai Says:

    You had me at, “Jaqai, you honestly tripped me up”

    I’ll remember this day always. Lets you and I gay up and go get married in CT.

  4. kløD Says:

    Religious groups will often pick and choose which sins they get their panties in a bunch over. The pope came out AGAINST the war in Iraq, but I didn’t see a lot of Christians flinging thousands of dollars into the anti-war movement. Anyway, we’re not blaming you for the Prop 8 results because, as made clear by official gay spokesperson Dan Savage, it was OLD black(and white) people who screwed up this vote, and they’re going to die anyway.


    Favorite gay slogan against Prop 8: “You have 10 wives, I only want one husband.”

  5. adrilla Says:

    That’s a great clip, I like Dan Savage a lot, I see him on Bill Maher’s show as one of his “real time reporters” and he’s a pretty funny guy and damn smart, witty as they say, whoever they are, he gave Ashton Kutcher (who was actually very surprising in commentary on the show. Who Knew? Him and Affleck both shocked me this season) but anyway, Savage gave Ashton a bunch of shit jokingly, but Kutcher handled it well. I’ve forgotten the point of this reply, so I’ll stop now. Adieu

  6. Joops Says:

    Churches are allowed to be politically involved now? I thought if they did so, they’d have their tax-exempt status revoked. Maybe that’s only if they endorse candidates. There were a few churches around here that supposedly told people to vote McCain and are in trouble as a result.

    Anyway, it comes down to this: People are dicks. No one really likes Freedom for anyone except themselves. They want everyone to be free to do only what they themselves would do. They love feeling powerful, and there is no greater power than “No, you can’t”.

    And, personally, I don’t give a shit if dudes want 20 wives or chicks want 20 husbands consisting of 17 men and 3 goats. For a country that touts “freedom” as much as the US does, I can think of at least a handful of countries where it could be argued the citizens are actually freer.

    Oh, related point: Religion ruins everything. I’m sick of everyone treating religion and church as something inherently good. It’s the opposite. It’s a delusional mental sickness used to divide people in yet another way into “us” and “them”. Believers feel more justified condemning anything they- THEY- decide that “god” is against. Arrogance that any tiny hairless monkey on a tiny rock scooting around a medium star would understand the mind of and speak for an omniscient, omnipresent being were one to exist is to me the height of narcissism and mental illness. Churches are scary, creepy homes of brainwashing, not good holy places where people actually follow tenets like “love your neighbor as yourself”. Unless they all secretly wish they couldn’t have gotten married, in which case I’m a bit wrong.

    Sorry for the tirade. I’m just sick of people pandering to religion and using it to masquerade hate and oppression.

    Nevermind all that, I’m here for the free shipping.

  7. Tonya Says:

    Doug is probably very proud of you for this blog. Just a note to say I voted NO on Prop 8 because everyone should have the right to get married and divorced like I did. I have a few gay friends that have been together longer than I was in my heterosexual marriage and they should have the same rights as I do.

    • adrilla Says:

      While I’d appreciate any pride Doug may have for me, it’s not about obtaining his or anyone’s pride, the argument itself shouldn’t be a stance that needs pride, it should be the same thing as if someone said black people can learn to read now, it should be a given, you should be looked down upon if you’re against gay marriage because it’s an archaic mindset and un-American, there shouldn’t be any argument about it at all. They should simply be able to marry the person they love and to not allow that is deplorable. Even if you say homosexuality is a choice, it still shouldn’t exclude them from the right of marriage. I can choose to date and marry only left handed, korean women, under 5 feet tall, between 50-70 years old, born in early July and no one has the right to stop me from that marriage (on legal grounds), why shouldn’t everyone else have that same ability in their particular description of a (human) lifemate?

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